It has been a while now since I have written anything new. I have been focusing all of my energy on raising my son and taking care of my wife. Instead of writing in order to feel some type of purpose, I have found great purpose in creating a new masterpiece on a perfectly blank canvas. That canvas is starting to do things for a response, roll, grab, and communicate. He is starting to form and it is incredible to think we created him.
My son was in the NICU for 12 days. He was born with HIE (Hypoxic Ischemia Encephalopathy). For some reason (“Ideology Unknown”), my son bled back into the placenta. After an emergency c-section, he was still born with extensive brain damage. But, he is perfect. It is almost as if we were expecting play-doh and received a hunk of clay. It is more difficult to form. The care expected to create from this medium is greater, but the result is more detailed, rich, and realistic. My hands hurt, but the shape is forming itself and it is one of the most beautiful things I have ever had the honor of sensing.
In short, that is why I have been absent from this blog. I have been creating.
Tomorrow, after six long months, I will focus on a different creation. For about eight years, I have been waiting to begin a life of pure discipline. A life totally focused in finding God, Love, and Peace in all moments. January 2nd, 2018 is when this life will finally begin.
I am nervous, to say the least. I am nervous because I understand the weight of this endeavor. I feel as though this will be my last attempt at becoming the man I was meant to be. Due to this being my last attempt, I will not fail. And now, my friends, I have a spirit watching, cheering me on with his laughter, and motivating me to stay on my path with his daily evolution.
Tomorrow, I begin a path of pure light. My life will consist of only things that bring joy and health; things that I have known for a long time are Good and Right, but that I have not had the courage to fully commit to. I am doing this for myself, first. This will bring my greatest contentment. If I commit to challenging myself everyday to be the best man that I can be, I will take my last breath with final peace. I am doing this for my son and my wife, second. If I am my greatest self, I will be my greatest self for them. I will be a man who my wife and son honor. This is my quest.
Tomorrow there will be no more tomorrows.
I am so insanely in love with my wife and my son, I will take a path that is insane to most people in order to be worthy of their love. I will be ridiculed, this I know. I will be laughed at, this I have experienced countless times before. I will be mocked. People will not understand my journey, but it will be mine and mine alone. I will walk this path with my best friend and she will hold my hand when I falter, but she will be walking her own unique path of different colors and shapes.
I call on God, our Mother, the Angels, all of the Ascended Masters, and my Ancestors. I call on light and love and all that is good and true. I call on the wind and rain, the trees and dirt, the rivers and waterfalls. I call you. For the next year, all that I do is to feel you in all things, to hear you more clearly, and to be totally immersed in this adventure in paradise.
I will not fail because you will be holding my hand. I will not fail because my love is too great. When I am downtrodden and blinded by the illusion of momentary pleasure, your spirit will remind me of my quest.
I bid you all farewell. For the next time I write, I will be walking the straight path where light is my guide and love is my compass.
If you desire to support my son and/or immerse yourself in his story of true courage and the power of love, visit https://www.gofundme.com/william-dunbar-v-medical-fund.